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Post by candy188 on Oct 23, 2013 10:09:22 GMT 7
蔡礼旭老师讲:
夫妻相处之道
Tips to Improve Married Couple Relationship男人对的时侯，你要把他当 父亲。
(When the husband is Right, you should treat him like a FATHER.)
平常的时侯，你要把他当朋友。
(Treat your husband like a FRIEND, Most of the time.)
先生犯错的时侯，你要把他当儿子。
(When the husband commits a Mistake, treat him like a SON.)
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Post by candy188 on Oct 23, 2013 17:48:56 GMT 7
怎么教孝道?
How to teach Filial Piety?
(1) 以身作则
Set A good example ourself
小时候冰箱一打开, 我的父母拿水果给谁吃?
拿给父母吃。
拿给爷爷奶奶吃。
When we take out the fruits from the fridge, WHO do we Give to?
Should give the fruits to our Parents first or rather grandparents of our kids
(By giving to our children first, we are teaching them selfishness)
(2) 亲师配合
Parents-teachers coordination父母懂得跟老师配合, 孩子行为规范就变特别快。 Parents who know how to coordinate with teachers will see tremendous improvement in the behaviour of their children.(3) 夫妻配合教孝
Husband and Wife synergy in teaching filial piety父亲要跟孩子讲, 你知不知道, ~~ 你母亲 怀胎 的时候, 吐成什么样子. ~~~ 你母亲在 生产的时候, 叫成什么样子. ~~~~ 你三岁以前, 抱得那个手臂都要断了
Father should describe to his children the difficult ordeal that their mother went through
~~ during process of pregnancy (morning sickness) ,
~~~ at the time of giving birth (screaming due to extreme pain)
~~~~ and raising him up (her hands are in great pain as a result of constantly carrying them before they are 3 years)母亲要跟孩子讲, 你父亲长期以来,
工作有多辛苦, 佷多亊都点点滴滴为你在规划。 Mother should describe to the children
how tough their father spends long-term on his work so as to support and plan for the children.
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Post by candy188 on Nov 5, 2013 18:03:32 GMT 7
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Post by zuolun on Nov 14, 2013 17:45:30 GMT 7
事勿忙 忙多错 勿畏难 勿轻略Whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced, all the battles you have won, and all the fears you have overcome. Steve Jobs' 2005 Stanford Commencement Address
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Post by zuolun on Nov 14, 2013 17:53:04 GMT 7
大学之道
大学之道，在明明德，在亲民，在止于至善。知止而后有定，定而后能静，静而后能安，安而后能虑 ，虑而后能得 。物有本末，事有终始。知所先后，则近道矣。古之欲明明德于天下者，先治其国。欲治其国者，先齐其家。欲齐 其家者，先修其身。欲修其身者，先正其心。欲正其心者，先诚其意。欲诚其意者，先致其知。致知在格物。物格 而后知至，知至而后意诚，意诚而后心正，心正而后身修，身修而后家齐，家齐而后国治，国治而后天下平。自天 子以至于庶人，壹是皆以修身为本，其本乱而末 治者否矣。其所厚者薄，而其所薄者厚，未之有也。
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Post by zuolun on Nov 14, 2013 18:28:00 GMT 7
施比受更有福
Giving is the best communication
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Post by candy188 on Nov 14, 2013 22:13:57 GMT 7
夫妻相处，只要能够守住一句箴言，保证可以白头偕老。
To ensure a Lasting married couple relationship, just keep in mind 1 proverb.
“只要从结婚开始到终老， 只看对方的优点，不看对方的缺点，就可以白头偕老”。
"By Emphasizing on the STRENGTH. Ignore the weakness."
 我记得我在珠海演讲的时候，当我把这一句箴言讲完，底下有一位女士马上喊得很大声，她说：没有优点！ I remembered that right after I shared this proverb during a seminar, a woman shouted loudly, " No Merit!" 我就对这位女士说，我说我真的很佩服你，你先生没有优点，你还敢嫁给他。人真的都是健忘的，我就把小叮当的时光穿梭机借给她。 I told that lady that I really admired her for the courage to marry her husband despite the fact that he had no virtue. Human beings are really forgetful. I lent Doraemon's time machine to her.  我说我们回到还没有结婚以前，男女一开始交往，在热恋的时候。每天还没下班，在那里看手表，时间怎么过得这么慢？怎么都还没有五点半？我要赶快下班，去接我女朋友，到那家新开的饭馆去请她吃饭、喝咖啡。吃完以后，还要去翻报纸，现在那一出电影特别好看。
Back to the time before one is married or during the courtship.
~~ The man is always staring at the watch & wondered why time is progressing so slowly? ~~~ The thoughts were revolved on the various activities that he should arranged for his girlfriend after knocked off from work. 为什么俗话说「只羡鸳鸯不羡仙」？因为在那个当下， 彼此只有一个念头我能为对方做什么。当对方时时处处都为你著想，你内心有什么感受？觉得很喜悦、很温暖。所以我们昨天讲到， 爱的感觉是温暖的。===> At that moment, there is only a thought, "What CAN I DO for the other party (loved ones). How do you feel when your beloved spares a thought for you all the time? Blissful, Heartwarming.
Feeling loved is Heartwarming.
 好，等谈完恋爱，步向地毯的那一端，结婚证书盖下去了，从我能为对方做什么，突然一变变成他应该替我做什么。 When one is married, the thought drastically changed from "What can I do for him/her?" to "What can she/he do for Me?"
这心念一转，从天堂到哪里去了？你看假如对方每天就讲，你这里没做好，那里没做好，你每天生活觉得很有压力。这个压力久了以后，就会愈来愈难受。 What happen to the Heaven after the shifting of thought? One will start to pinpoint the weaknesses of the other party daily, resulting in immeasurable pressure.
所以天堂跟地狱只在一念之间，我们能把天堂变成地狱，我们也能把地狱变成天堂。 Heaven and Hell is dictated by the thought. We can always convert the Hell into Heaven (being considerate, Emphaize on the Strength)
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Post by zuolun on Nov 15, 2013 10:49:23 GMT 7
Don't do harm to others but must be vigilant so as not to be harmed.
AESOP FABLES: THE FROG AND THE SCORPION
青蛙与蝎子的故事
这个故事，最近总是重复的讲，每次讲给不同的人听都有不同的感慨。
蝎子要过河，它向善良的青蛙求助。
青蛙说，你有毒，万一你蜇我怎么办？
蝎子说，我蜇了你我也会沉入河底的。
善良的青蛙觉得有道理，于是背起蝎子过河。
游到河中央的时候，蝎子还是蜇了青蛙。
在沉入河底的那一刻，
青蛙问蝎子，为什么明知道会沉入河底，你还要蜇我？
蝎子缓缓说到，因为这是我的天性。
以前总是对这个故事不解，因为一句天性就可以置两人的伤害于不顾。而现在，总是听惯了那句，对不起，我就是 这样的人，对不起，这就是我的风格。
青蛙明知道蝎子有毒，依然抱着一份善良和单纯背着蝎子过河，可是同故事一样，现实社会里，这份善良和单纯往 往被人践踏着，因为这样的践踏，从此也就没有了青蛙背蝎子过河的故事。
也许真的有些人，他们给予的伤害是出于天性，甚至明知道自己会受到伤害，却依然义无反顾。我在想在最后沉入 水底的那一刻，蝎子有没有流眼泪，有没有后悔？也就天知道了。可同样也有些这样的人，明知道对方会给自己带 来伤害，却依然执着的认为自己能够改变，执着的认为自己可以感化。善良的青蛙也许不知道，有毒是蝎子的天性 ，不是一只青蛙能够感化的，而需要漫长的进化。
其实这个故事还有一个结局，那就是青蛙感觉到了蝎子还是会伤害它，于是它游到河中的一片荷叶上，躺在那。蝎 子说，我们不过河了吗？青蛙说，会过的，总有那么一天。蝎子很着急地说，留在这我们会被太阳晒死的。青蛙依 然静静的趴在那。也许只有等到蝎子变成另一只青蛙，它才能游走。蝎子什么时候能变成另外一只青蛙，变得善良 单纯呢？呵呵，善良的青蛙是那么的固执，固执的认为蝎子会变，固执的相信这一奇迹。也许还没来得及变化，他 们就被太阳晒死了。
这个故事总是被人套用于爱情。
为什么青蛙明知道会受到伤害依然背蝎子过河？因为它爱上了蝎子。
为什么蝎子明知道会同样受到伤害还要蜇青蛙？因为这是蝎子表达爱的一种方式。
也许，生活中你也扮演着蝎子和青蛙的角色……
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Post by candy188 on Nov 18, 2013 15:26:15 GMT 7
见人善 即思齐 On seeing Others Do GOOD Deeds, we must consider Following their example.
纵去远 以渐跻
Our achievements may be lagging behind those of others, but we are making progress.
 见人恶 即内省 When seeing Others Do Wrong, we must immediately Reflect upon ourselves.
有则改 无加警 After making a mistake, we should Correct it, or else be extra cautious NOT to repeat the same mistake.
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Post by candy188 on Nov 24, 2013 23:30:10 GMT 7
Below phrases are some teaching of dizigui 弟子规, under the category, 余力学文 which explain effective studying methods: 读书法
Correct Methods to Study
 有三到 心眼口 信皆要
involves CONCENTRATION in
~~ the MIND
~~~ EYES and
~~~~ MOUTH
~~~~ and BELIEVING in What We Read is equally important.
方读此 勿慕彼 When reading a book, do NOT Think about another book.
此未终 彼勿起 If you have not finished reading the current book, do NOT Start another book.
 宽为限 紧用功 We must put in plenty of time and effort to study
工夫到 滞塞通 Given Time and Effort, you will Thoroughly Understand.
 心有疑 随札记 就人问 求确义
If you have Questions,
- Make Note of them,
- and ASK someone who has the Knowledge, for the Answer.
 Explanation with English subtitle: |
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Post by zuolun on Nov 25, 2013 10:18:40 GMT 7
唐詩三百首
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Post by lovelydaughter on Nov 25, 2013 10:32:11 GMT 7
见人善 即思齐 On seeing Others Do GOOD Deeds, we must consider Following their example.
纵去远 以渐跻
Our achievements may be lagging behind those of others, but we are making progress.
见人恶 即内省 When seeing Others Do Wrong, we must immediately Reflect upon ourselves.
有则改 无加警 After making a mistake, we should Correct it, or else be extra cautious NOT to repeat the same mistake. Dizigui is a great teaching.  We reap what we sow. |
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Post by candy188 on Nov 25, 2013 21:29:09 GMT 7
Di Zi Gui (弟子规), (Standards for being a Good Pupil and Child) was written during the reign (1661-1722) of the Qing Dynasty Emperor Kangxi by Li Yu XIu.
The book is based on the Ancient Teaching of the Chinese philosopher Confucius that emphasises the basic requisites for being a good person and guidelines for living in harmony with others. Like the San Zi Jing（三字经）, it is written in three-character verses. Confucius emphasised that the Basic MORAL VALUES and VIRTUES should be FIRST taught to a child since young;
those values are to
(1) respect elders, (2) respect brothers and sisters, (3) respect wife and husband, (4) respect the society and (5) respect the country as a whole. He believed without those values all other learning would amount to nothing.  弟子规 圣人训
Standards for being a Good Student and Child was taught by Chinese saints and sages of the ancient past.
首孝悌
First it teaches you How to be Dutiful to your PARENTS, and to be Respectful and loving to your SIBLINGS.
 次谨信
Next it teaches you how to be Cautious & how to be a Trustworthy person.
泛爱众
Furthermore, it teaches you to Love ALL Equally.
而亲仁
Be Close and Learn from people of Virtue and Compassion
有余力 则学文After you have accomplished all the above values, you can learn other skills to improve the quality of cultural & spirtual life.
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Post by zuolun on Nov 27, 2013 13:00:55 GMT 7
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Post by zuolun on Nov 28, 2013 10:32:45 GMT 7
Dreaming of Home and Mother
Say Goodbye 送别
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We reap what we sow.